At the moment, these are the top 5 things wrong with America...excluding, of course, the upcoming War on Iran and Syria.
1. Family car decals. I think this annoying trend started as a way for soccer moms to justify their gas-guzzling, global-warming SUVs. "Look, I have 7 kids ranging in age from 2 to 14, so I need a Ford Explorer, dammit!" What I can't figure out is why otherwise decent suburban parents would want to advertise to every sexual predator sitting in traffic, the ages and hobbies of all of their children. As a side observation...though these decals are offered in "dark-skinned" versions, you will never see black folks partaking in this silliness.
2. Leaf blowers. Seriously. The leaf blower really is a prime example of what is wrong with our society. It's an overly obnoxious, clumsy pollution machine that does nothing but blow your waste onto somebody else's property. Oh, yeah...and wake me up at 7am on an otherwise lovely weekend morning. Grab a fucking rake, and shut the fuck up.
3. Self-checkouts. I'm stunned speechless by the stupidity of retailers' move towards self-checkouts. Just look under the sign at Home Depot or Winn-Dixie that points to the new "ultra-convenient" self-checkout mess. It's complete chaos. A significant percentage of the public will never understand how use them. And, for the people who, for all intents and purposes, should be able to use them, they don't work. And the store still has to hire someone to stand there to help nearly every single person. What genius came up with this pennysaver? I'll take a surly cashier who hates his/her job anyday over this mess.
4. Glenn Beck. How did this hateful, racist, xenophobic bumbling Baby Huey-looking dork get his own show on CNN? That Bill O'Reilly really riles them up. And, that Ann Coulter...grrrr. But, I can't imagine that even hateful, racist, xenophobic middle Americans find Glenn Beck entertaining. Even Faux News didn't want him.
5. "Santorum to Think About U.S. Enemies." Rick Santorum has been drafted by a conservative "think tank." I thought this was an article from the Onion when I first saw it. But, apparently, Rick Santorum is one of the conservative rights most important, um, cough, um, thinkers.
